A few aspects of having returned home:
I learned quite quickly after coming home just how helpless I was. Every move, every gesture, no matter how small was an effort. I survived this part of the experience because of the fantastic care and the help I got from my wife, Judy. I could not have successfully fended for myself while under the duress of recovery. I would have to have been institutionalized.
My household chores fell onto her; washing dishes, taking trash and recyclables out to the curb, doing my own laundry and so forth. All of that fell on her while she coped and still copes with medical issues and pains of her own.
"In sickness and in health" the words go and that has certainly been the case.
My medication regimen is complex. Once Judy managed to sort out all of its details, I transferred them into a spreadsheet which I still use to keep track of what I have taken and what I have not taken, when I did the taking and what my blood pressure and heart rate were each time. When the visiting nurse first came to the house, I was able to present that info for rapid understanding. It would have been impossible trying to keep track of it all simply by memory.
Medicinal side effects were and are a problem, especially with dizziness and balance. Adjustments needed to be made and thank heavens, my doctor's colleague was on call when I needed him. My inquiries to their office were returned in mere minutes. I was listened to very carefully and corrective instructions were given to me quite clearly. I very much derived a sense of security from that.
However, in spite of the wonderful care, in spite of all the words of encouragement from doctors, nurses, loved ones and friends, mental stability can still be a problem.
What I have endured doesn't rise anywhere near to the horrors I keep reading about in the news. I fully know that and I can't even begin to imagine what continues to befall the victims of those horrors. Even so, after almost one month (not such a long time, really) since the heart attack itself happened, I fell into a deep sense of despair.
I went to my bookmarked YouTube URLs and went after every upbeat song I could find. I listened to "Click-Clack" by Dickey Doo and the Don'ts, "Love is like A Butterfly" by Dolly Parton, "I Got Lucky" by Elvis Presley, "Honeycomb" by Jimmie Rodgers, "The Martian Hop" by the Ran Dells, "Twenty Six Miles" by The Four Preps and "Maid In Japan" by Buck Owens.
It helped a little bit but I still need to work on keeping a positive attitude. It isn't easy.
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